Bekah Smith with her baby son Calvin(Image: Bekah Smith)

A picture of a mum cuddling her son which told a harrowing story

Bekah Smith was subjected to years of abuse by her former partner who even strangled her when she was pregnant

by · Liverpool Echo

A picture of a mum cuddling her son which told a harrowing story

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In the comfort and safety of her home in Kirkby, Bekah Smith stole a quick selfie while snuggled up with her tiny son as he slept soundly on her chest.

It would have been a snapshot of the love and warmth that only a newborn baby can bring, were it not for the bruising that marred the mum's right eye. The knowledge that this scar was inflicted at the hands of the man who claimed to love and care for her shatters the scene irrevocably.

Bekah had met Karl Draper in December 2020 through mutual friends. Initially, things were "great".

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But, within months, he turned violent. It would be years until she felt able to speak out. Bekah said: "The relationship progressed very quickly, too quickly. He moved in straight away.

"For the first few months it was great. It was about four months in when things changed. He started isolating me from my friends. He first got violent when I bought a dog.

"He asked me for money. I said I couldn't, so he threw the dog cage at me. It was just horrific. It just got worse when I was pregnant."

Bekah Smith(Image: Bekah Smith)

Liverpool Crown Court heard this week that Draper repeatedly strangled Bekah during the course of arguments. He even did so on two occasions after she had fallen pregnant with his child, leaving her "terrified that she was going to lose the baby" as she struggled for breath.

Cheryl Mottram, prosecuting, outlined how the thug had also punched a hole in their bedroom door, callously broke items of her jewellery, covered their living room floor in shampoo and even kicked their puppy on one occasion - causing it to "yelp in pain". Draper also "blackmailed" her into continuing the relationship - messaging her claiming that he was "on top of the heights and was going to kill himself", referring to the Quarry Green Heights block of flats in Kirkby, on one occasion after she attempted to break it off.

On March 21 2022, their son Calvin was born. Bekah told the ECHO that she had been hoping for a "fresh start" after she and Draper moved into a new house with their newborn baby and her two other children. But it wasn't to be. The 34-year-old said: "It just got worse."

Less than two weeks after she had given birth, he threw Bekah to the floor - causing the scar from her caesarean section to reopen.

On another occasion, when Calvin wasn't even a month old, he "forcefully" thrust the baby's bottle into her face. It was this incident that caused the black eye.

Bekah Smith with her baby son Calvin(Image: Bekah Smith)

Draper heartbreakingly told Bekah that he "wished he wasn't on the birth certificate" and, alarmingly, threatened that she would "end up in the morgue". She was strangled again after a night at a comedy club turned sour then, after he had taken up mixed martial arts, he viciously booted her to her back before throwing her onto their bed.

In June 2023, she tried to end the relationship again. But Bekah then found Draper in the living room "trying to put a rope around his neck".

The final straw came in September that year when, after he had snapped the power cable of her older son's PlayStation, the youngster told her that he no longer wanted to live under the same roof as her abuser any longer. Even after Draper had been asked to leave, he climbed into her home through the window twice under the pretence of "wanting to sort things out" before threatening self harm.

Domestic abuse help and support

Domestic violence or abuse can happen to anyone.

NHS advice says if you are at risk of domestic abuse or violence you can:

The Survivor's Handbook from Women's Aid is free and gives information on issues such as housing, money, helping children and legal rights.

Men can email info@mensadviceline.org.uk, which can refer you to places that can help, such as health services and voluntary organisations.

SWACA – Sefton Women's and Children's Aid offers free practical and emotional support to women, young people, and children suffering from domestic abuse. You can contact SWACA by phone on 0151 922 8606, by text on 07779745594 and by email at help@swaca.com

For forced marriage and "honour" crimes, contact Karma Nirvana (0800 5999 247) or The Forced Marriage Unit (020 7008 0151).

Merseyside-based charity Savera UK supports people at risk of 'honour'-based abuse, forced marriage, female genital mutilation and other harmful practices. You can call their national helpline on 0800 107 0726 on weekdays between 9am and 5pm.

Galop provides support to lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people experiencing domestic violence.

Anyone who needs confidential help with their own abusive behaviour can contact Respect on their free helpline on 0808 802 4040.

Bekah said: "He got everything he wanted. I wasn't near my friends, I didn't know anybody and he could do what he wanted.

"He started hitting me in front of the baby. The first time he did, he was just four weeks old.

"I had a black eye from pushing the baby's bottle into my head. I thought it was going to come through the other side.

"There was also strangulation, and lots of bruising. I tried to break up with him, but he tried to hang himself and the police came.

"Every time I tried to get rid of him he would threaten to kill me or himself. It was mental torture."

Draper pleaded guilty to engaging in controlling or coercive behaviour and five counts of assault occasioning actual bodily harm. The 23-year-old, of Jade Close in Kirkby, was jailed for two years on Monday and handed a restraining order banning him from contacting Bekah for five years.

Karl Draper(Image: Merseyside Police)

Sentencing, the Honorary Recorder of Liverpool Judge Andrew Menary KC told him that he had shown "real warning signs" and "red flags". He added: "Often, people such as you, who engage in domestic abuse, have two faces - the one presented to the public, and the more sinister one which emerges in the context of an intimate relationship."

Bekah read a statement to the court during Draper's sentencing hearing, which she said had "finally given her a voice" after he had "silenced her for three years". In it, she said: "I sometimes look back on photographs so that I can see that I was a totally different person to who I was before I met Karl.

"I’ve lost the sparkle in my eye and the smile on my face. I’m devastated to recognise that I’m a shell of my former self.

"Before this relationship, I was an outgoing, positive and a happy person. However, I now constantly fear the worst and I’ve been in the lowest mental state I’ve ever been.

"I recognise now that I didn’t deserve the abuse. I am now receiving the support I need not only for me, but for my children to have their mummy back - healthy and happy.

Bekah Smith(Image: Rebecca Smith)

"Whilst I am so thankful for all the help and support services, I can’t help but feel resentful that I am having to rebuild my life and live in fear because of the control and abusive actions and words of one individual who claimed to love me. I genuinely struggle to understand how someone could behave in this way and subject someone they claimed to love to so much abuse, both physically and mentally.

"There were times during the abuse that I genuinely thought I would die, and I think about that often. I do fear for my life and that of my children and family."

Bekah is now hoping to move forward in her life, as well as to help others to escape the cycle of abuse she found herself in only a few months ago. In particular, the mother-of-three is urging others to utilise Clare's Law - which allows members of the public to access information about a potential partner's previous convictions for violence.

Mental health support

Helplines and support groups

The following are helplines and support networks for people to talk to, mostly listed on the NHS Choices website

  • Samaritans (116 123) operates a 24-hour service available every day of the year. If you prefer to write down how you're feeling, or if you're worried about being overheard on the phone, you can email Samaritans at jo@samaritans.org.
  • CALM Campaign Against Living Miserably (0800 58 58 58) is a leading movement against suicide. It runs a UK helpline and webchat from 5pm to midnight 365 days a year for anyone who has hit a wall for any reason, who need to talk or find information and support.
  • PANDAS (0808 1961 776) runs a free helpline and offers a support service for people who may be suffering with perinatal mental illness, including prenatal (antenatal) and postnatal depression plus support for their family or network.
  • Childline (0800 1111) runs a helpline for children and young people in the UK. Calls are free and the number won't show up on your phone bill.
  • PAPYRUS (0800 068 41 41) is an organisation supporting teenagers and young adults who are feeling suicidal.
  • Mind (0300 123 3393) is a charity providing advice and support to empower anyone experiencing a mental health problem. They campaign to improve services, raise awareness and promote understanding.
  • Students Against Depression is a website for students who are depressed, have a low mood or are having suicidal thoughts.
  • Bullying UK is a website for both children and adults affected by bullying.
  • Amparo provides emotional and practical support for anyone who has been affected by a suicide. This includes dealing with police and coroners; helping with media enquiries; preparing for and attending an inquest and helping to access other, appropriate, local support services. Call 0330 088 9255 or visit www.amparo.org.uk for more details.
  • Hub of Hope is the UK’s most comprehensive national mental health support database. Download the free app, visit hubofhope.co.uk or text SHOUT to 85258 to find relevant services near you.
  • Young Persons Advisory Service – Providing mental health and emotional wellbeing services for Liverpool’s children, young people and families. tel: 0151 707 1025 email: support@ypas.org.uk
  • Paul's Place - providing free counselling and group sessions to anyone living in Merseyside who has lost a family member or friend to suicide. Tel: 0151 226 0696 or email: paulsplace@beaconcounsellingtrust.co.uk
  • The Martin Gallier Project - offering face to face support for individuals considering suicide and their families. Opening hours 9.30-16.30, 7 days a week. Tel: 0151 644 0294 email: triage@gallierhouse.co.uk
  • James' Place - supports men over 18 who are experiencing a suicidal crisis by providing quick access to therapy and support. Call 0151 303 5757 from Monday to Friday between 9.30am and 5.30pm or visit https://www.jamesplace.org.uk/

She added: "I was that scared he was going to kill himself or kill me that I had to call the police, it wasn't a choice anymore. He kept telling me they wouldn't believe me.

"But they have been fantastic. It's 2024 and we are talking about so many other things, but domestic violence is so taboo.

"If people talk about it, it could help others. Things become so normal in abusive relationships, and maybe somebody reading this will realise there's a red flag and take more notice.

"I don't want to date again, but if I did I would also make sure to use Clare's Law. I think people forget that it's a thing."

Bekah has now set up a petition calling for stricter bail conditions to be imposed on perpetrators of domestic violence while awaiting the outcome of their court cases. To view or sign the petition, click here.

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